Category: Janetisms

Janet: How was your sandwich?

Ralph: I woofed it down.

Janet: Way to go! You didn’t Ralph after you Wolfed it down.

The more people that don’t know, the better.

Janet while cutting up a nice canteloupe: “Eva would be in second heaven right now.”

Ralph: “You mean first heaven? I don’t think it’s second heaven but I could be wrong.”

Janet after 30 minutes: “I just figured it out. Would you like to know?”

Ralph: “Yes, please.”

Janet: “Seventh heaven!”

Knock you off your socks. Juanita. So close. 🙂

On the eve of the show we get another great Janetism:

I don’t throw money to the wind.

You are spilling stuff and you’re not even drunk or stoned. You are stoned sober.

—JMS

“Ralph, I am so proud of the father you were and the grandfather you have become.”

We were at BJ’s last night having a few biers with friends. The local Catholic priest, who shall remain nameless, was eating a pizza at the bar. I thought the pizza looked delicious from where I was sitting. I asked the bartender to order me what the priest was having.

That pizza was amazing! Maybe the best pizza ever. Upon the completion of our meal I decided to go talk to the Father…..

That’s when Janet stopped me dead in my tracks, saying: “Don’t do it, honey. Let him go in peace.”

🙂

His click is tocking. 🙂

That is not happening unless you want me to go out on a wild limb.

Life’s too short to milk it. —J.M.S.

What happens in the afterlife stays in the afterlife. And I am going to go with the flow in the afterlife. –J.M.S.

… be cold and skinny than fat and warm. –JMS

“They never saw us coming but they are gonna see us coming now!”
–J.M.S.

That was the one thing I forgot to remember. —J.M.S.

The clock is going to be running around the clock. —J.M.S.

“I don’t poop every day unless I take that shit.”

and

“I really don’t do want to go inside.”